To celebrate International Women’s Day last week, my office organised a morning tea for a group of women who have for most of their lives taken a back seat in order to support their husbands. These women have not had an easy ride in their lives and face the day-to-day challenges of caring for a loved one who could have been affected mentally or physically or both by being a soldier in Vietnam. The organisation I am talking about is called The Partners of Veterans Association of Western Australia and its mission statement is:

While the association basically has partners of Vietnam veterans, it is not exclusively for the partners of Vietnam veterans. The group of women I met last Friday, though, did all fall into this category. The women who came to see me were: Sandra Cross, Anne Holtom, Ivy Phelps, Carole Matthews, Sally Warner, Kerryn McDonnell and Janet Gilders. We had a very interesting discussion about the challenges and issues faced by Vietnam veterans and, consequently, how partners and their children’s lives have been affected. I will share some insights with you now.

The group support each other because only they know and understand what the other is going through. All of the women agreed alcoholism and depression are big problems for a large number of veterans and it was important for them as partners of veterans to acknowledge that the difficulties were directly related to the traumas their partners had experienced in the past. The morning was insightful and there certainly was not any ‘poor me’ discussion—in fact, quite the opposite. The sense of humour these women have about their lives and experiences has helped them through the toughest of times.

The group organise social events throughout the year and talked about a trip in 2008 to Vietnam. The reason for the trip was to try and gain a deeper insight into the landscape and the experiences their husbands had had in Vietnam. They explained that not only was the trip enjoyable but it also helped their husbands by giving them new memories of Vietnam rather than replaying the traumatic memories of the past. One of the benefits of belonging to the group was that everybody knew what it is like to have a bad day. One of the women said, ‘Sometimes when you were going through a particularly difficult patch, and couldn’t make it to a meeting or social event, you didn’t need to explain why.’

Another major concern discussed was the fear of suicide, not only among the veterans but also among the children of the veterans. This is an issue close to my heart. I have spoken about youth suicide on a number of occasions. On Friday I attended a fundraiser for the Youth Focus group who are based in my electorate. I recently held a youth suicide roundtable in my office with the Health and Ageing Committee. During our discussion there was talk of a veteran who had committed suicide and also the son of a veteran who had committed suicide recently. Suicide is a tragic event, and the more we can do to support those in need, the more chance we have of saving people’s lives.

Despite only being fully operational in Western Australia since 2003, The Partners of Veterans Association of Western Australia have touched the lives of many in different ways. They would also like to encourage the partners of our younger generation of current serving forces to become members and gain the support, experience and wisdom of women who understand what they are going through. The association originally started out holding meetings in people’s houses but, due to the illnesses of the veterans, this did not work very well. After moving a couple of time, they now share premises with Carers WA in east Perth. There is a drop-in resource centre that is manned by volunteers, and monthly meetings are held where guest speakers are invited to talk on various issues.

The Partners of Veterans Association are a not-for-profit, non-government organisation and rely heavily on grants and donations. I speak of them today for a couple of reasons. One is my admiration for the commitment shown by these women and also to acknowledge the difference they are making in people’s lives. People like Secretary Kerryn McDonnell and President Sandra Cross are at the heart of the association. Mrs Sandra Cross was included in the 2009 edition of the Who’s who of Australian women on the theme of ‘Lessons we learn.’ Interestingly, the book was released on 27 March in celebration of International Women’s Day. Sandra made a pledge to herself to help as many partners as she could after receiving many setbacks when her own husband became ill. I would also like to thank all of the ladies who attended the morning tea last Friday and hope to continue to receive the support from government and the community to carry out their very important service for all partners and their families.